This is gonna be a long post, not only because I haven't posted in a while, but because a lot has been going on here at Snyderland.
First I want to talk about the happy stuff, because it is what I want to concentrate on and reaffirm that life mostly is GOOD.
The socks are coming along well. I started the second sock because I was afraid that I might run out of yarn. I split the yarn into two balls by eyeball and weighed them, and hopefully have "half" the yarn in each ball. Here's a peek at the two cuties:
Wednesday I went and had my nails done as I usually do once a month. I've been going to the same nail place (Alice's Nails) for over ten years, and all I have to do is call and when I arrive they have my massage chair ready to go with a lovely hot water soak infused with my favorite soaking salts. They further spoil me with the latest ladies magazine, a hot rocks massage, and great music. They are the best! And as usual, I was asked if I'd like a little something painted on my nails. As I'm truly not the kind of person that would paint girly silliness on my nails, I once again said, "No, thank you." But. This time I was tempted with a LILY! And DING! A Lilylilylily! Why of course, because our little Lily is coming soon! And, in honor of our little Lily, and probably not just a little bit because of the sadness in Snyderland this week (later), I did a silly girly thing:
When I told my husband what I'd done, he was totally silent. He asked me very quietly if I was okay. That's how off-the-charts this is for me. BUT. I'm enjoying them thoroughly--I'm catching myself slipping off my shoes just to peek at them.
Other random happinesses in my life (which must be recognized to balance out the sadnesses):
The beautiful bromeliad:
And my Boy George:
And now on to the sadness. Sunday morning I was sitting at my computer and heard some screaming and moaning and crying. Figuring it was the neighbors to the west, who in the past have been known to have LOUD arguments in the backyard, I rolled my eyes and sighed, thinking it would pass soon enough, after he came out and yelled, then she would scream back at him, and then they would go back inside their house and that would be that. I stood up and peeked out the window and couldn't see them outside, so I shrugged and settled back in my chair. Then I heard a gunshot. A loud gunshot. A very close by gunshot. I jumped up and looked out the window again. Nothing. I ran to the front of the house and looked out the window. Nothing. I ran downstairs and looked out the front door, then the east side of the house. Nothing and nothing. I ran back upstairs and woke Chip and went to the bathroom window and looked out. With a sinking heart, I realized that the activity was at our favorite neighbors' house. And as Chip described it, we walked into someone else's nightmare. Our favorite neighbor, apparently distraught over a separation with his wife, shot his sleeping daughters, killed the six year old, and injured his thirteen year old daughter. Then he killed himself.
I can't begin to tell you how surreal an experience this has been for us. We'd chatted with him a few days before while he was riding bikes with the girls. I had smiled only the day before when I heard the girls squealing and laughing as they played in the backyard.
There is no way to explain it, to justify his actions, except to be thankful that we don't understand, because it means we are not mentally ill. And to be sad that he didn't reach out for help. And to gather our loved ones to us when we are in distress. And to be thankful for our family, who would not allow us to be alone for a minute when we are in distress.
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